By Ike Mgbatogu
Staff Writer

Onumba.com,USA ——— “Religious exploitation.”

That was how Anambra State Governor Charles Chukwuma Soludo called out the phony pastors in the state bamboozling desperate and gullible congregants of their churches, living large and getting away scot-free.

But all of that is going to kibosh.

“If you want to practice Christianity you are free. Anambra is predominantly a Christian state, but we will not condone using the name of God to scam people.”

Can the church say Amen?

Obviously, not these churches. For all they know, the governor is on the side of Lucifer hampering the spreading of the gospel. But for all we know, that is arrant bullshit and it is laudable they are now being flushed out quicker than you can say ‘sticky poop.’

It is refreshing that finally, someone of authority is moving to deploy the full weight of the state to combat the vexing menace of religious exploitation that has festered for too long in the face of government cricket.

“Oburo na Anambra zi,” said the governor.

Translation: Not in Anambra anymore.

There’s enough blame to go around for this, though

But as the hammer barrels down on these scamsters, it is worth noting that they have help. That help is coming from these exploited citizens themselves for refusing to even acknowledge being scammed. It is that kind of denial, that ilk of idiocy, that is frustrating ——— leaving us with the recognition that these boneheaded churchgoers, whether they are aware of it or not, are willing participants in their own exploitation. Some of them would even camp out all day at the church hoping to pray and fast away their woes and wahalas.

Dr. Bishop Adeniyi Adeyemi decried these treacherous activities after appearing on NIDA City Podcast with Host Kemi Adeosun.

“Any faith that is absolutely dependent on God for everything is an irresponsible faith,” said Dr. Adeyemi, GMD of DealClinchers Limited, a real estate company.

“You must work hard, then God will bless your work.”

For Soludo, scamming is scamming and that has to stop

Meanwhile, Soludo’s crackdown reflects a seismic shift from the conventional belief that matters of faith is a no-go zone to his bold posture that scamming people, even within the contours of faith, will not be tolerated.

And the governor is off to an optimistic start, moving to kneecap these scrofulous bastards and flush them out of their scandalous gambits, which for too long, roped in gullible plebs into skullduggerous rip-off festering on the cop-out of devotion to Christian faith.

Balderdash.

The governor’s crackdown comes at a propitious time when the proliferation of churches in the state is mind-bogglingly spiraling way out of control. Churches and ministries bearing slick sounding monikers are littered in cities, villages and hamlets established by all kinds of phony actors peddling hogwash to woo, pimp and pickpocket desperate citizens.

“Onye zukata afia osi na olu pastor amakwue nya,” Musicians Umu Obiligbo’s lyrics:

Translation: Someone who has been a trader for years would all of a sudden abandon trading lying to himself and others that he has been called to do God’s work.

Governor Soludo, obviously, has bigger fish to fry. He is a busy dude. But he was able to recognize that the cardinal duty of any government is to protect its citizens, notwithstanding that giving to the church is purely voluntary. It is. No one disagrees with that. But given that it has become quite apparent that these faithfools need help, it calls for government intervention to pull them out of the trappings and addictions of this unending scam.

Should government be involved in this kind of stuff?

But some might frown at government intervention in a matter involving personal choice. Yet, others would say that the overarching question is whether government crackdown would even succeed in prying these unyielding churchgoers out of the tight grip of these gluttonous vultures?

Well, that all remains to be seen, but one thing is clear: a determined Gov. Soludo has come out swinging. A parade of these sham pastors were recently arrested and interrogated by state investigators who reported gathering a dossier of confessions.

A far cry from being the anointed servants of God they claim to be, these pastors have run roughshod over the poor, sick and vulnerable Anambrarians often trapped in their cagey and elaborate cobweb of lies, deceptions and manipulations.

Fake pastors use fake miracles as bait to lure desperate congregants into church pews

Nowhere is this orgy of deceptions and spiritual hooliganism more staggeringly visible than during ceremonies to hype staged miracles. And true to form, the arrested pastors confessed to staging miracles, which more than any of their shenanigans, account for why these churchgoers willingly place their trust in these golliwogs rather than their faith in the Almighty God.

“All the 8 arraigned fake pastors have confessed to conducting fake miracles.”

“Onye si na ona agwo oya bia kanyi kpoje gi na uno ogwu,” said Soludo.

Translation: “If you claim to have healing power to cure the sick, let us take to you to the hospital where there are many sick people.”

“Fa kpolu nwunye gi, okpolu

Translation: They would lure your wife in for some religious activity, and before you know it, they would keep your wife for themselves.

“Fa pkolu ada gi nwanyi, okpolu.”

Translation: They would lure your daughter in for some religious activity, and before you know it, they would keep your daughter for themselves.

But these 8 pastors are hardly alone. All across the densely populated landscape of Anambra state, you would find a swarm of phony pastors engaging in miracle stunts, conning members and draining their earnings. Congregants witnessing and soaking in these false miracles, phony prophecies and monumental lies would then tell others in the community to make a bee-line to the same church for their own pour of miracles. It results in the growth of church membership and sums up to financial windfall for these hornswoggling pastors.

Kudos to Soludo, but other states ought to follow suit to torpedo the displaced pastors from re-emerging elsewhere.

Stubborn churchgoers proof ‘Religion is the opium of the masses’

But what’s flabbergastingly frustrating, perhaps more than anything else, is knowing that these fake pastors have been repeatedly unveiled as straight-up con-artists, yet, for the life of me, these stubborn churchgoers continue to succumb to this nauseatingly maddening claptrap.

Call it rank stupidity or unhinged naivety, either way, Anambrarians are being defrauded even as they are mumu-ing all over the place denying it or totally oblivious to their foolishness.

And to add insult to injury, rather than ditch these atrocious pastors like a ‘bad habit’, some of these churchgoers would accord these pastors the benefit of the doubt, fearing the would be comeuppance of discrediting the ‘anointed servants of God.’

Others would downplay or dismiss the criticisms against these pastors, believing that they would ultimately face the wrath of God on the judgment day. I get all that, but until the judgment day, retire your epic stupidity, turn the page and quit funding their lavish lifestyle right here on earth.

Two creepy observations

One, these slick pastors are pretty good at their game. What they do, and they do it flawlessly, is feed their prosperity-fawning congregants the mind-bending baloney that poverty stems from evil spirit to be eradicated with prayer, fasting , anointed oil and holy water, all of which is going to cost the congregants, typically in the form of money, goats, cows, land and bags of rice and beans. Uppity members would even lavish these sham pastors with pricey gifts such as refrigerators and cars.

Two, they have managed to convince their congregants that many of their problems are tied to the sworn platoon of enemies looking to devour them ——- physically and spiritually. Because of that, these churchgoers are often petrified of the boogieman tip-toeing around waiting to pounce. Notice, if you get a chance, that a smorgasbord of the prayers and shouting from these pastors focus on protecting their congregants from these phantom enemies. Bs. These guys are full of it. Please, no one has that many enemies to the cusp of channeling an inordinate amount of time, sermons, songs and prayer points to combat them. The fact is, your enemies, if any, for the most part, are not interested in harming you, yet these scandalous pastors religiously dangle the ubiquity of these enemies, instilling that anxiety in their congregations.

Taken together, prosperity gospel posits that giving generously to the church is tantamount to sowing a seed that would sooner rather than later bloom into abundant wealth for the giver.

But that’s a cap. A big, fat lie.

Fancha bu ndi ori.

Translation: They are all thieves.